


Limerick

by feldman



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-01
Updated: 2011-05-01
Packaged: 2017-10-18 20:29:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/192988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/feldman/pseuds/feldman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for Shannon's Scullyfic Limerick Challenge:<br/>"In honor of this legendary tale, we want you to try your hand at a limerick<br/>X-file. No, not a limerick *about* TXF; an X-file written in limerick form."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Limerick

"Our perp is a master of thuggee,  
Who enters through doors made for doggies."  
The slide show commenced  
With blood-smeared evidence  
Of cereal untouched and gone soggy.

"His roommate has testified truly,  
That before everything went all screwy,  
His friend he was reading  
The listed ingredients  
His monotone creepy, but soothing.

"After that, he says, blood went a-flying,  
The victim too injured for crying.  
The roommate was floored  
By the doggy door gore  
From the leprechaun fleeing the crime scene.

"Ingredients *as* incantation,  
Causing a manifestation--"  
"You suggest Lucky Charms  
Was the source of the harm,  
Unleashing a tiny assasin?!"

She stifles her chuckles with choking.  
"Do you know what they might have been toking?  
Neuroscientists ken  
Seeing miniature men  
Is an outcome of Jimsonweed smoking."

He leans in, "This mayhem has reason--  
Several pets in the neighborhood eaten--"  
And the heat of his stare  
Made her not want to care  
"Come with me, Scully. Hunt the wee madman."

They staked out a suitable kitchen,  
Reading the box was her mission,  
While he sat on the counter  
Eating ounce after ounce of  
The nadir of modern nutrition.

"They put three kinds of sugar in these!"  
She wondered how sweet would his lips be?  
Then she froze in sheer terror  
The piano-wire bearer  
Had just licked the back of her knee.

Mulder had the advantage of height,  
And the sugar rush made him feel light,  
Milk on the linoleum  
Helped pandemonium  
And Mulder, for once, won the fight.

The murderer locked away tight,  
They comforted each other's fright,  
They engaged in frottage  
In their motel cottage  
And were late the next day for their flight.


End file.
